Ja Nee en Daar Sy!!

Stephen Covey said "you have to decide what your highest priorities are and have the courage, pleasantly, smilingly, non-apologetically to say NO to other things.  And the way you do that is by having a bigger YES burning inside of you."  The implication is that we firstly cannot do and achieve everything we think we can. There are limits to how how much we can take on and we need to sift through the things that we need and those that we simply do, because of obligation, responsibility, habit and insecurity.  We need to have a list of highest to lowest priorities and although they can change, we need to stick to the basics, keeping it as simple as possible.  Like in business for example, we need to decide what are really the things that we are passionate about and stick to them, even when times come that we are uncertain of where they may get us. Drifting away from what we are good at and enjoy is not a recipe for success.  It can only cause distraction and uncertainty.  We also have to do the things that bring profit to a business and to our lives, in other words investing in the right choices, where we will receive the best return and reward.  As in life those things may not be the most popular or fit in with the mainstream, but there are many way to get to a destination and making sure that you are rewarded, whether in business through clients that pay well, or in life through relationships and people that offer something in return, this is the best way to achieve your priorities ultimately in a manner that is humble, but uncompromising.  This will take the kind of courage where you may ruffle feathers and you may become a target of speculation, rumour and jealousy.  That is OK because it means that when you say no to something, it is almost expected and it becomes easier to get back to your priorities which is where your strength lies in any event.  You can without guilt or apology (but not arrogantly and intended to hurt) say that you simply choose to no longer participate in the relationship or say no to be used and abused for your generous spirit.  But many times we are racked with guilt when we say no, that we end up caving and begrudgingly take on a task or a decision.  This is why it is so important to analyse our priorities, and then to implement them so as to foster and nurture the YES things in our lives.  What things really build us up and make us want to do better and be better, what things inspire and make us happy, what things bring peace and joy to us, those are the things we need to put at the top of list, so that when decisions need to be made there is an overwhelming sense of passion burning inside us that triggers us to be the person and live the life that we truly want.